Weblog not to be used for the other use.

Part of the reason I don't have things to write about here is because I tell them to Catrina via email or on the telephone. She's the main person I want to tell things to anyway. I'm not normally the kind of person to talk about stuff with people. It's not that I'm closed off or anything. Anybody who knows me even slightly can tell that. I'm easy going and often talktative. I make a point to make eye contact with people and put myself and others at ease in conversation. I can talk about touchy-feely things without feeling unmanly. I like to whine and bitch and complain and gossip. But if it comes to a personal crisis or loss or something that's really bothering me, the last thing I want to do is talk about it. Except maybe with my significant other. And I don't know where that stems from.

This week, for example, was kind of shitty for me. With lingering shittiness to follow. I really just wanted a do-over. If I could dial back time and redo it I would, even though I'd have to redo everything and it'd feel all deja vu-ish and redundant and boring (wouldn't that suck?).

People that I work with or people that I see and talk to outside of work would ask me what was wrong and whatnot, but I had absolutely no interest in talking about it. Just talking about things that frustrate me can frustrate me further.. especially if what's bothering me is something involving my own mental error. Making mental errors brings me back to my last nerve, wich I seem to subconsciously stand on. And I don't need anyone else's weight on that nerve in addition to my own. Except Cat's. Cause she's light. :-p


There are things that keep me sane though. The superb things in life. Freedom and money (sorry to be shallow, but money brings independance, and independance is a wonderful thing) and my co-worker Dianne Archer and xbox and Scrubs season 2 and The Offspring and ibuprofin and Jesus and toilet paper and the fact that I'll soon be home driving in my own car and, last but not least, my sexy/cute/gorgeous/intelligent/understanding/patient girlfriend.

Oh, and speaking of which, Thanksgiving is coming up. And I'll tell you what I'm NOT thankful for: The need for war, lack of turkey drumsticks, distance between me and my main squeeze, muddy roads, lack of privacy, my flabby bits, selfish people, early mornings, peanut butter, humvees that break while you're driving them, cigarette butts, songs ripped off by Tina Turner, ugly shirts, etc.

In other words, there's not that much to be UNthankful for. So I'm not doing too bad. Plenty of good things around. I know, I have a twisted way of looking at things. You see, the glass isn't half full or half empty.. the glass is just two times bigger than is truly necessary. Gives the wine some room to breathe.

Yeah, I'm eeeeh.. retarded. *clicks "publish post" button*